Ahh...Breakfast at Tiffany's..what a fabulous movie....Talk about making me happy..I love Audrey Hepburn..I want to be just like her..She is soo beautiful and so sophisticated...Could I be like that?...maybe...I once read a bumper sticker that said "life is not about finding oneself..its about creating oneself"...I wonder if that's true..maybe I will just create a new self...remove all the the things I don't like and of course leave the things I do like about myself...That would be nice...huh...

I have a wonderful life...from the outside I must seem like I have everything I could ever want...But its not really like that at all...I wait for something more...but what I don't know..I hate my job..but my job does pay the bills and it affords me to buy nice clothes and do nice things...so whats the deal..Could I be one of those people that I read about in magazines, who give up everything to go find a higher meaning in life? Oh I don't think so...sleeping on a mat and eating some sort of grass is not my idea of bliss...believe me....I would rather run off to an island for a week...lol...How would I create a new me?...this is a question that needs to be pondered....

Ok so I walk in my front door after a long day at work and there is my boyfriend..just sitting on the couch like a slob..( not really a slob, but that is the only word I can think of)..Either we have been together to long or something else because that happy to see you feeling is so not there..I would have been more excited to see a UPS package for me instead of this..Ugh...another negative part of my life..when will this list end..You see there is no more I love you so much...want to spend every moment with you feeling anymore. That went bye bye a while ago...If this is what marriage is then "No thank you"... Its not that I don't love him..its just not exciting anymore...I get more exciting thinking about a sale...please put me out of my misery...and just then my little Chihuahua comes running towards me like a little dream..She is my baby girl..she is a delight and an instant mood enhancer...she never gets tired of me and her excitement is the same everyday when I come home..I love it...she is an extension of me..she is a fashionista in the dog world!!!...

So anyway...I decide right there that this is not gonna be one of those nights where I sit alone and do nothing..I decide to rent a girly movie..Breakfast at Tiffanys...Perfect...I will put my most comfy jamies on, make popcorn, pour myself a glass of wine and get cozy on the couch..Perfect..if anything comes out of this relationship it will be me finally being able to make myself happy instead of relying on a man to do it...and that's exactly what I do that night....

Ugh..why do I attract the most unappealing men...I am not a snot but what makes these men think that I would talk to them..let alone possible go out with them...lol..How annoying...I am still standing in line at Starbucks waiting for my grande coffee when by some miracle this man who seems hell bent on talking to me finally shuts up...Thank god...Sometimes it makes me rethink the way I look..do I look like I attract weirdos? Omg...there goes my self confidence...

I am definitely redeemed when the girl behind the counter tells me she loves my bag!!!!..thank you...you just made me a whole lot better..lol...Believe or not I need that confidence boost..Underneath all the fabulous clothes I definitely need reassuring constantly...thats bad...

Ya know as I come to think of it, I have always lacked confidence..how does one gain confidence? Is it something you learned? I think that it should be something that is taught, like say being honest...I think its just as important..lol..well anyway..

I arrive at my desk to a pile of papers sky on work to be done..Ugh..just what I need right now..This job is so stupid and soo not me..I should be doing something else, but what? What is my calling? I know my fashion is my passion, but you can not make a living shopping..Or can you?..That would be so nice...just as I am mentally going over this dream..I remember I have the lasted Vogue magazine in my bag..Yeah!! and it has all the new fall fashion in it...Gotta love it...All I want to do is take a quick peek at it then I will be refreshed and ready to go...Its kinda like someone being revived after passing out..because all I have to do is smell the crisp pages and admire the pictures and I am ready to go....

So today started of the same as it always does..I woke up with that disturbing feeling in my stomach that I can not identify with. I wake up everyone morning like this and all I want to do is go back to bed. I have no desire to start the day. Why is this?..Why can't I once just wake up and bounce out of bed with a pep in my step? Ugh!.. I can not be depressed..that is not it or is it? NO!!!.

My mood quickly changes when I realize that I am wearing my new outfit, I bought it last weekend and this is the first time I am wearing it...SWEET!!. its a fabulous snakcskin DKNY dress, my new Tory Burch sandals and a totally fab Yves Saint Laurent bag..OK officially happy..

Ok....so fashion rules my life...its my one true love..its my happiness..its well my everything..and that is why I am THE FASHIONISTA....

Its amazing to me how one can feel when one has a fabulous outfit on...its like nothing bothers you..lol..thats funny...because as I'm feeling this high..I suddenly remember the real world in which I do live...Ugh...and there it is...I come crashing down...I am on my way to my job..my job that I hate...

Hello darlings..I have been sitting here for quite sometime now trying to open this blog with something really good..but I cant..I am usually a girl that is never without anything to say but for some reason its not coming out today...All dressed up & nowhere to go is a blog loosely based on The Fashionista...a girl who has everything but still feels like she has nothing...you see not everything is always what it seems...shes the girl you envy but yet little do you know her life is a mess...She hides behind the perfect life...to afraid to let anyone see the real her...sound familiar?...I'm sure it does...all of us at one time or another has felt the same feeling...I hope I have your interest and you will stay turned....